YOU HAVE TO LAUGH

^^ This image by Diane Alkier on Unsplash was 'the dream' but let's see what actually happened ^^

Isn't being able to laugh at yourself so very important? I truly hope the answer is 'yes', because I think I spend more time laughing at myself then doing anything else at all! Not only do I find the most cheesy jokes ever bloody hilarious (such as two fish in a tank, one says to the other 'do you know how to drive this thing'... brilliant!) but sometimes I just do and say the most stupid things.

I often whisper to myself 'I carried a watermelon' as a nod to Baby from Dirty Dancing (one of my top films of course) because, quite honestly, I surprise myself at how much of joke I can be sometimes.

Take this cracker from this week as an example...

A couple of weeks back I won a little giveaway on-line for a sour-dough starter. This translated in my brain as a sour-dough starter 'kit', and I imagined a cute little box turning up, with a small packet of flour, some yeast and whatever the hecky-flump goes into producing a sour-dough loaf. 

I wait patiently (and hungrily) at home for said bread magic to arrive and, this week I hear a sturdy 'thud' hit the floor and think 'hooray, bread will be eaten this week!'. On approaching the door to see what our lovely posty had brought with him I see a very tiny envelope that is a strange shape.

Now, most of you will probably be way ahead here and know exactly what I received through the post... let's see shall we...

I open the envelope and what do I see?

Well....this... with no instructions, nothing but this.

On first inspection I wonder why someone chose to send me a packet of what looks like old Parmesan cheese or flakes of cement, and then, after inspecting the envelope further I see the senders address and suddenly the penny drops. This is it. This bag of wizardry is my bread 'kit'.

What does a girl do next you cry?

Google... yes, that was the first stop.

I learned a lot there; mostly that 'starter' not only means garlic bread or a yummy soup, but is also a proper 'thing' to make sour-dough (and not a 'kit' either). 

As I stood in the kitchen, contemplating my next move, like breaking quarantine to pop to the shops for a fresh white loaf and forget the entire thing, I heard my friend, the brain monkey banging his cymbals together... that's it, he said... Peta (Nourishing Soulfully) will know what to do, she had been talking about sour-dough starter on Instagram stories but I literally thought she was just making it for the first time and had found a 'starter' recipe, you know, that a newbie would use. Then I think 'of course not, this is Peta, she is always cooking, she has done this before and will know what to do!'.

I immediately left Peta a voice message on WhatsApp and waited for the genius to respond.

What response did I receive? Laughter.

Uncontrollable, hysterical laughter, snorts and all! (sorry Peta!)

I don't blame her. What an absolute MUPPET I am!

Once she had composed herself, which took a while, she then proceeded to tell me that, once I have rehydrated the crusty dust in my envelope, I will have to get lots of flour to 'feed' it (ffs, really? Feed it? I just want fresh bread!).

It all sounded very technical and even more high maintenance then the cat is, but I wanted to give it a go, after all I waited so long for my bread 'kit' to arrive, plus I don't like to quit!

So my next move was to get flour, but do you think I could find any? No, because every bread obsessed, sour-dough making magician has bought it all already - sodding quarantine.

There you have it.

I am officially a wally! But did I laugh? Lots! So it was worth it!

Story time over.