24 January 2019

THE BEAUTY OF VULNERABILTY



On Tuesday I put a post up on Instagram about vulnerability and as I was writing it I realised that I had a little more to say on the subject, so I decided to make it into a bigger post. It’s a subject I have been thinking about a lot of late, for many reasons, and I have also heard a couple of people talk about it on podcasts, so the subject has really been pushed in my face recently, which I see as a the universe telling me something, so let’s dive into it.

On my Instagram post I opened with the quote above because I think it is beautiful and very true indeed.

We can be vulnerable in so many ways in our lives; post trauma or bad health, after we lose a loved one, when we grow older and can do less for ourselves but, to be clear, today I want to talk about the vulnerability of our hearts and souls. More and more we see people putting on an act, especially for the sake of social media; we’ve all done it, me included. We have all tried to paint the perfect picture of our lives, when what is actually happening is not that way at all. Thankfully I have now given that horrible past time up, choosing to be as open and honest as I can without pushing it too much. I know when things are too personal to share and therefore I won’t mention something at all, or even hint at it. My only exception to the rule is discussing issues about mental health, because I know that telling my story can help or may help even one person, so it’s more than worth it.

I digressed slightly there so let me pull it back to the subject at hand... let’s step out of our online lives and into our real ones, and ask yourself this: how much of yourself, of your soul, the good and the bad, do you reveal to the people close to you?

Have you ever stopped to really think about how hard it is to let people truly ‘see’ you, see into your heart and soul; to let someone so far in that they have access to your most vulnerable self, the self you most try to hide from the world. I think if we are honest, not many of us have that with people, many times in our lives, not without fear accompanying it; fear of judgement, of being rejected or argued with for a difference in opinion. But when you do experience it, when you find that friend, loved one or relationship where it just feels like you have known each other forever and can really just ‘see’ each other without judgement; that, my friends, is a keeper isn’t it?

I really think that allowing ourselves to be vulnerable is one of the hardest things to do, because it has potential to open up old wounds and can mean that we are standing in front of someone who can squash our hearts/minds at any moment, but for the right people/person isn’t it worth the risk? Isn’t it worth laying yourself totally open to the danger of loss, getting your heart broken or walked away from rather than remaining so insular that you lose all human connection or never experience true love or true friendship?

This connection with another human being must surely be the basis for the most beautiful, magical moments in life? When someone really ‘gets you’, and not only that, but accepts who you are, even when you fall apart into a million pieces, showing every hidden part of you or when you are at your most joyful and content... they are still there, holding your hand, unshaken, not scared or threatened in any way, just a constant presence. Having that faith in someone else, a trust beyond comprehension is true vulnerability and, like the quote by Leo Christopher says, it is the essence of existence. I really think that this allows us to open up to the most honest version of reality and can make us feel utterly whole. 

It really is a beautiful thing.
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