17 April 2019

THIS HAS TO STOP


^^ Background image from Unsplash, by Annie Spratt / Original quote source unknown, found on Pinterest ^^

I had a whole other post written up for today (I'll schedule it for another time!), but then I was listening to a podcast yesterday and I heard someone talking about something she had witnessed happening one day in her local gym in the US somewhere, where a woman she knew to be very capable was ‘dumbing herself down’ in order to allow a man to explain to her what she should do  on a basic piece of equipment (even thought she knew much more than him in that environment!). Sounds crazy right? Yeah, it is, but that is one example and, for the purpose of this post I and not going down the whole feminist route at all; hearing that podcast example was just a prompt for me to explore my thoughts / experiences around why we may feel the need to dumb ourselves down in certain situations.

As I thought about the scenario described in the podcast, I had a sudden, somewhat horrific, realisation that I do this ‘dumbing down’ behaviour too, although it is not because I am allowing someone to show me something (especially in the gym dammit!), it is more a self-preservation thing for me I think. If I had to paint a picture of what I am like a lot of the time, so that you could immediately reference something you know, then just think about the character Chandler from Friends; a bit of a joker who uses humour as a defence mechanism; that is totally me. 

There is nothing wrong with a sense of humour of course, but I have become very aware that I use it to keep people away from knowing ‘the real me’ sometimes; the person that is at the very core of who I am. That is a form of dumbing down in itself because, rather than get overly into a conversation I can often throw random humour in to almost try and divert from something. As an individual, I have a lot of questions and ideas or opinions to offer, but I don’t let people see that because of fear. The fear is always of not feeling qualified enough to give them the answer they want, need or expect, and there is a voice always offering up the following dialogue ‘...they will think you are stupid, they won’t agree with you and you will be wrong’. Because of that I use humour. 

I am usually the one to make people laugh, ‘Lucy has a wicked sense of humour’ is something people say a lot, and I have (I’m a hoot for heavens sake!), but I am very aware of not letting my qualities rise up and overflow into general conversation because I have a lot of fear, so I dumb myself down so that I am not asked questions that I may get 'wrong' (read this to mean that someone may not like my opinion), or so that I don’t upset anyone, because if you are ‘the funny one’ people have no expectations of you, other than some fast humour, and I can do that easily.

So what are the good qualities? How do we start to step out of the dumbing down and into our true self? Well, I am starting to work on being less afraid to offer up my opinion; people who are very close to me will probably be thinking '...you are never short of an opinion you feisty mare!', but that is because they truly know who I am. In general though, I end up being the goofy, clumsy, joker and whilst that is part of me (boy am I clumsy sometimes!), I also have other qualities that mean I am not a stupid human at all. I am intelligent, I have opinions that I am seriously passionate about and I take many subjects very seriously because of this; so dumbing down is, quite literally, DUMB.

We all need to be more confident and true to showing up as who we are. Sometimes there is a real need to put on a front in certain situations in order to get through them, we are all human and we all do this from time to time, but there is no need to be afraid of being you (saying this to me as much as you!). It is very true that people who have a fundamental issue with some part of our personality are often just projecting their own issues on you, so let's all just try and shine. Let's make a commitment to showing the world who we really are; own your sh*t because it is fine for us all to be different to one another, thank God we are different.

Having read this, can you see any dumbing down in your life? Look out for it and stop it and, if you feel like sharing it, leave me a comment and let's chat!
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14 April 2019

WEEKLY GRATITUDE



Confession time my loves, I’m struggling with my time management a bit. I’m very aware that I will find my place in my new routine soon, but it is having a bit of an impact whilst I do. As I write this post it is half past seven in the morning, I am heading to work my Sunday shift at the hotel in a couple of hours, and whilst I have the time I sit scribbling down ideas for Leaf Lane Studio and this very blog. I haven't quite learned how to juggle it all yet, and the biggest thing I have noticed, thanks to sitting to write my ‘Weekly Gratitude’ posts, is that I am really getting no time whatsoever to do things that light me up and that results in me sitting at the computer with rather a blank expression when it comes to this very post.

There are plenty of things I am grateful for, but I have become conscious, over the last two weeks, that I need to have a serious think about when I get ‘me’ time and then what I actually choose to do with that time. Right now, I am so exhausted that I sleep and then, when I wake up, I’m working again. I definitely need to find a more efficient way of managing things. In my Wednesday post I made a commitment in front of you, to take myself out for a blog/business planning coffee morning (or Lucy equivalent, aka tea morning!) and I must make sure this happens asap, because when I am at home there is always something else that needs my attention or needs doing, it is all to easy to lose yourself in the 'list of crap' that needs doing instead of throwing yourself into your business. 

So, I’m going to be working on my own well being a bit more, which I am grateful to have recognised sooner rather than later as an issue, but for now at least I will attempt a list of things from the past week, or some general musings about life, to tide us over this week!

Let's go!

:: I don’t know if you guys ever do this but, occasionally, when it’s super late at night and I’m really tired, I will decide to go onto iTunes and look at the cheaper albums (I don’t buy much music these days so the cheap albums are always my ‘go to’ section!). For some reason, that I can never explain, I always end up buying a random album late at night that I’m really ‘feeling’ in my tired stupor, and then I wake up in the morning and think ‘why did I get that, I’m never going to listen to that!’. This happened recently with the Florence and the Machine album ‘High as Hope’; I like a lot of the music I have heard over the years from them, but I’ve never been a big enough fan to buy an album... but I was a couple of weeks ago apparently. My point to this long waffle is to say that I have discovered a new favourite song whilst giving the album a chance (it’s not bad actually!); the song is called ‘The End of Love’ and it is so beautiful. The album version has a long, instrumental opening section, which really gets you into the track and then it is full of gorgeous lyrics which grabbed me by the heart. It is one of those songs that needs to be played loud for a full on experience! Give it a listen on Spotify and let me know what you think. 



:: Despite losing my way, organisation wise, since starting my part time job, I’m actually really enjoying my role as housekeeper! When I decided to get a job, I knew that I’d need to get something around twenty hours a week, and I had in mind the exact thing that I knew would suit me and I can honestly say that this job is it. I wanted something that wouldn’t involve me ‘taking things home’ mentally after a shift, or take up hours and hours of head space before a day of work, due to worry or anxiety about what I’m doing. My role in this beautiful hotel, is to create a lovely environment for people who are escaping their day to day routines and I’m really loving being a part of that. Not only that but I get to do all of that whilst having the most stunning views and amazing surroundings to work in. I’m very grateful for my little job and the people I get to work with; it has had a positive impact on my mental health too, which is invaluable to me.

:: Although I have a stack of books piled up to read, I had a recommendation, from the awesome Adam Palmer on Instagram, to read Sadhguru’s ‘Inner Engineering: A Yogi’s Guide to Joy’, which as soon as I looked into it I knew I had to buy and read it as a priority. I have listened to a few of Sadhguru’s talks on YouTube and find him utterly captivating (with a rather unexpected sense of humour too!) and I am loving his book so far, it is so up my street! 

:: This week I had an appointment with the mental health team to discuss moving forwards after my recent assessment. I wasn’t looking forward to it one bit, after my previous experiences being so bad, but I must say that this time it was different. I now have a person who is my dedicated central point, for want of another term (or because I cannot remember what her role actually is!) and she will help me or direct me to other services that may be useful and/or be a contact if I need help. Where I struggle is that I don’t need too much 99% of the time, I am high functioning and can cope with a lot; it is the rare 1% that is super severe that I need a little assistance in order to cope and, this time, I am hopeful the balance will be right. The lovely lady I saw was not too formal (phew) and wasn’t willing to pigeon-hole me at all, which is a positive thing. There is nothing worse than people who assume you are a certain way just because you have mental health battles. Fingers crossed for the future of that!


:: For basically two whole years I have not been able to spend money unless it was absolutely necessary, and over that time I have been unable to treat myself to the one skincare product I absolutely love using and that works wonders for my skin. So, with my first pay from the hotel I decided to get myself a small bottle of Pixi ‘Glow Tonic’ which, as it turned out, I got for free because I had enough points on my Boots card! I really love this stuff as it brightens my skin and rejuvenates it so much, but it doesn’t come cheap, even a small bottle is £10, but it’s such a nice treat for me. At my age I need to invest in skincare!

:: Gizmo has been super clingy to me recently (more than normal) and, when I get home from work and have my 30 minute nap (I use a timed ‘sounds’ video on YouTube which wakes you up after 28 minutes, it works for me!) she is always right by my side, stretching out he little paw to hold onto my arm or my hand an join me for a little snooze. She is like my little shadow and I utterly adore her. She is enjoying the sunnier weather too and has been outside rolling about on the patio with all four legs in the air, soaking in the warmth; she has always loved spring. The return of the sun also means she gets to play her two favourite games, ‘running up the palm trees’ and ‘hunting the pretend beast’ (which is basically just us waving a palm leaf about in the grass and her charging about after it! 

:: I cannot tell you the difference the lighter evenings are making to me. I am definitely struggling more with darkness as I get older; I seem to need much more light and sunshine now than ever before. My mood is just so much happier with more light and I am generally more motivated and inspired to do more things. Up until even a few years back I used to dread the thought of summer, but these days I cannot wait! Bring on the sun!


:: I was really happy to receive the March subscription box ‘Little Piece of Cornwall’ through the post last week; a subscription made up of the most beautiful, hand picked goodies from this even more beautiful county. When it arrived it felt like Christmas; I love subscription boxes and really miss getting my little beauty one I used to get. I was kindly gifted the March box of ‘Little Piece of Cornwall’ and I quite literally squealed when it arrived, because it is genuinely something I’ve been wanting to try since I saw the gorgeous Lucy, from Love Kernow mention it on her Insta story. The box has the most stunning foiled lettering on which I am obsessed with and the products inside, all sourced locally and hand picked around the theme of food for March, are all super yummy and gorgeous (I love the mini Cornishware cup more than I can say!). You guys should definitely check out their website and see what the subscription has to offer; if you love Cornwall, live in Cornwall and want to support local business or discover new ones, or you just want a gorgeous surprise box of goodies coming through your door every month, then you will love it! Click right here to head to the website and, if you want to go for it (go on, treat yourself), you can use the code ‘LUCY2019’ to get £10 off a six or twelve month subscription! I genuinely love it so much; I won’t accept anything that a) I wouldn’t spend money on myself or b) doesn’t fit with what I align with, because I want you guys to know that, when I work with a brand, it is because I adore them... and this is one of them! Go check them out and follow them on Instagram too for a dose of Cornwall.

:: I’m loving seeing the bluebells gradually opening up all over now and various pops of colour from the wildflowers as the spring into life again! There are also lots and lots of magnolia trees in full bloom here too; they never fail to look beautiful.

That is all for this week guys; I promise I will try and get my life back on track and get out and about a little more to show you some beautiful places in Cornwall. I have been working every weekend at the hotel, so it has been tricky, but balance will return in the end I am sure. Thank you so much for bearing with me through it all. 

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10 April 2019

SELF DEVELOPMENT | 5 THINGS I'M WORKING ON NOW


^^ Image by  Dominik Resek via Unsplash ^^

I know that the whole 'self-development' thing has become a phrase which is a little over-used these days and, because of that, has lost some meaning, but for me it is so important that I try to keep it at the forefront of my life every day. I love having full control over how I develop myself in a way that feels good to me and connects me to my place in this universe, because the way I choose to live my life, the way I show up for other people and the way I continue my human experience as a whole, is totally up to me to develop, no one else is going to wave a magic wand and make things happen for me. I don't want to conform to what we are told we should be and I certainly am not easily led by materialism or advertising in any way these days; I know what I want and, day by day I am learning more about who I am and that journey is so exciting to me.

I am completely aware that to really 'find' yourself is hard work and that to be the same as everyone else is the easier path, but easier doesn't mean better and easier certainly does not equal growth.  No matter what anyone likes to think about people who are into self-development (bring on the 'hippy' / 'woo-woo' comments!), the truth is this: to become more self aware is to embrace it all; the good and the bad, and you have to acknowledge your pain points and feel into the rawness of being you before the really good  stuff appears, but when the really good stuff does appear, that is when life gets magical.

So, here are my top five priorities for my own self-development at the moment, let me know one or some of yours in the comments, I would love to know what you are working on.

1 | M A K I N G  S P A C E

Do you ever reach saturation point in your mind? It can be many small things that have built up, or it can be one big thing; whatever it is though, we all need to have a clear out mentally (and sometimes physically too) of our 'baggage'. Right now, I need to redefine my focus, because it has got a little hazy over the last year or so; this is connected to my business mostly, because I have learned a lot and want to rework some things. To do this I need to make some space to allow my brain to think things through and know what will be a beneficial move for me.

I have realised how important it is, in order for true growth to take place, to intentionally create space in order for something new to appear, or else our energy is just getting more and more diluted as more 'stuff' gets packed into our minds. It is so easy to stay stagnant and wait for things to appear, but I truly believe in giving the new thing a nook to manifest in; we have to make sh*t happen for ourselves people!

What do you need to make space for to move forward in a positive way in your life?

2 | S H O W I N G  U P  A S  'M E'  O N  E V E R Y  P L A T F O R M

Something that has been bugging me for a long time is that I just cannot seem to maintain my 'voice' when I switch between my 'From Lucy with Love' and 'Leaf Lane Studio' Instagram pages. Something literally clicks in my head and I seem to lose all my personality when trying to do a story or post on Leaf Lane Studio's account (it's the same on Twitter too - not that I use Twitter that much; it's not my favourite platform, even though I have a lot to say so that may surprise some of you!).

I have made the decision to be exactly who I am across all accounts, because that is all I can be. I think I have been very self aware that it is a business and not a personal account, but I am also mindful of the fact that I cannot make everyone happy and that someone who aligns with who I am as an individual will 'get it' and those who don't like what I put out there will fall away, and that is okay!

What tends to happen with me is that I will stay away from doing something altogether if I am not 'feeling' it for whatever the reason may be. I want people to see exactly who I am, regardless of what the context or relevance to my business, which is the beauty of Instagram Stories after all right?

So you can expect to see more of  my general life on my Leaf Lane Studio account now too, so please make sure you are following along!



3 | N O W  I S  A L L  W E  H A V E

I know the whole 'living in the moment' thing has become a bit of an over used thing to say these days, but I am trying to really lean into re-training myself to do this because it is one of the biggest reasons I suffer with anxiety. As humans we are very much conditioned to think a lot about our past and dwell on what our futures may hold for us, which of course needs to be done to survive; we all have plans we have to think about and bills to pay, but I am talking about the bigger, more significant picture.

I think it is safe to assume that most of us, if not all of us, find ourselves getting upset or worried about things we feel may bring us some concern in the future; it is natural to worry about having job security or about whether our income is enough to sustain us and our families, but where we fail is making up too many stories that scare us so much that we become stuck in our lives.

The same goes for the past and things that have been done to us or that we may have done to others. If we refuse to learn from these times, and not move forwards, then we will either remain constantly sad and/or angry or turn bitter or worried about life in general, which will have a major effect on all of our friendships and relationships. There are always ripples out from anything we do in life, like little butterfly effects around every corner.

Let me tell you guys, this whole 'being in the present moment' is so hard to do though. I have been reading and listening to many people talking about this subject and it is extremely difficult to get my mind around just 'being', rather than comparing and contrasting to the past or what is yet to come. But think about it for a second; how many times do you feel anxious about a situation or slightly worried about doing something because of a previous experience? (Living in the past coming to haunt your future self!).

My most common anxiety is concerning people; what someone thinks, what someone may say, what they may do etc and so, for me, trying to get out of that habit is one of the best things I can do for self care, because it brings me so much anxiety. I can literally sit and make up a story of something that may happen or something someone just might be thinking about me and, before I know it, I am an anxious disaster. How crazy is that though? That we can think ourselves into that sort of mindset based on no facts whatsoever. That is what I am trying to change. 

Let's all try to live a bit more in the moment we are currently in, rather than wasting it thinking about a moment which has passed, or one yet to happen.

4 | M O R E  'M E'  T I M E

Okay, so this is a sweeping statement that could mean anything from taking a bath to going shopping (FYI, I am not a big shopping fan, not unless it is a) for gym kit or b) for art materials!), but I am talking about real quality time that speaks to my soul.

My morning workout is my first dose of 'me time' every day; it is my time to put my headphones in and lift something heavy to challenge my body, and I always leave the gym feeling so much better. What I am looking to bring back into my routine, now that spring is here and the weather is better, are my walks, no matter how short, along the coast path or just somewhere that is peaceful and allows for reflection. This walking meditation has always been the time where I can hear my intuition the most and can work through anything that needs filing away in my head or needs to be delved into more. I get my best ideas when I walk alone, quietly contemplating things and just allowing time and stillness to help me relax. The same is true late at night, when I step out and look up at the stars; staring at a familiar constellation and allowing my thoughts to pass through my mind always helps ease any anxiety I may have. The stars and nature are my 'go to' for me time.

5 | J O U R N A L I N G

I have kind of lost my way with journaling recently and I don't feel too good about it. Life has turned up a notch and many of my self-care habits have dropped away and I need to sort that out asap. For me, writing is such a passion but journaling is something altogether more cathartic and I miss it. I have suddenly developed a real guilt about having quiet time and need to drop that immediately because it is one of the most valuable things I can do to help my mental health and also generate ideas for my work. It's funny how we let go of the most important things sometimes yet still manage to find time for the most random stuff that we don't really need to do at all.

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I think the spring is all about a bit of a life audit for me; an evaluation of all the facets of my life and a re-jiggle to make sure that I have balance and time for fun (and that I try to drop all the guilt surrounding taking a few minutes off here and there!). Ultimately it will be for the greater good to take a step back and reflect for a day or two. I think that I will hold myself accountable right now and say this: I am going to take myself out for a bit of a Leaf Lane Studio / From Lucy with Love evaluation and planning morning, somewhere out of the house and where I won't get distracted by the cat or housework. It is easy to put things to one side when they are 'yours' and, actually, I deserve a morning of sitting somewhere pretty, with a nice cup of tea and a slice of cake, and working on fun ideas for my business!

There you go guys, I will get on that right after the Easter holidays, because right now Cornwall is a little bonkers! Let me know what you think you need holding accountable for when it comes to self-development, let's work on this together.

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3 April 2019

FEELING THE FEAR



I wanted to spend a bit of time talking to you about how important it is to really lean into fear, emotions and overwhelm sometimes. Last week was one of the most challenging weeks I have had for a while and, although I usually share a lot with you guys, I am not ready to share everything that went on in my world last week, but now that I am safely on the other side of things and have had time to reflect, I can see why things had to happen the way they did and have a greater understanding of why I needed to have that 'moment' last week.

One of the biggest, most significant shifts I have made more recently, is to try to allow any emotions I am feeling the space to come out, and not stuff them down until I can barely breathe. This is not easy, and it is super exhausting to go through, but when you allow it, beautiful things can happen.

Anyone can have a good cry, shout or whatever it is that we do to release the pent up emotions we hold inside, but what I really mean by giving them 'space' is to not only let them out halfheartedly,  but to really let them out; sob until you have to bathe your eyes open, scream into a cushion (if that's your thing... personally I'm a crier!) and, when you are done, and probably totally exhausted, that is when the magic starts to happen.

PS: It won't feel like magic at first...



Tuesday was the day that I totally fell apart last week. I felt like a broken human; nothing could stop the tears flowing except when I could barely breathe anymore and had to keep splashing cold water on my face again and again to stop the swelling in my eyes. Those things distracted me for long enough to stop the crazy overflow of tears, which only started again as soon as I went back to my desk to try and work (no work happened).

What started off as a few tears over a little bit of stress/worry, spiraled so fast and, before I knew it, I had hit rock bottom and life was a total mess. I felt frightened, overwhelmed by everything life had to offer and my brain chose that time to fire up my ego into 'attack' mode. Add to the mix a poor limping Gizmo who had somehow suddenly hurt her leg and I was a disaster (animals will always make me cry anyway!).

(This may not sound like much guys but, take my word for it when I tell you that I am giving you a very 'airbrushed' version of events).

That evening though, as I sat bathing my eyes open and feeding my dinner to Gizmo (she had a great time), I had this total feeling of calm wash over me. Partly it was utter exhaustion of course, but also it was very much about needing to let everything out. I sat for a while just taking in all the things that had happened that day; all the crazy thoughts and irrational fears and I let myself realise that I had just come through a really terrible day and I was proud of myself for it, which may sound silly to you, but it was so hard but I had made it out the other side.

The biggest thing I try to remember on the real crisis type of days, is that it can only get better, so hanging on, even by the thinnest thread, is what I focus on. What feels like the scariest, loneliest moment, can become your biggest victory and most joyful lesson, despite the pain.

All it takes is honest reflection.

Some times there are things that we need to learn about ourselves or our lives that are so hard to face that it is easier to bury our heads in the sand and just carry on glazing over them, but how can we ever move forward if that is what we continue to do all the time? We really have to face things head on; seek help, talk to someone, journal our feelings, meditate - just do anything positive!

Yes it hurts like hell, it really does, but it is so worth it for the personal growth alone. You may spend a week recovering from it (and using litres of concealer to cover the red, swollen eyes) but my goodness, you will be so much better off for it.

Facing fear is brave, it is full of surprises too. Don't let your ego tell you stories of how things may turn out either, because that ego of ours talks utter sh*t, it really does. If you are feeling fear or overwhelm then face it head on so that the next time you feel it you will be that little bit stronger!

Here are my top three pieces of advice for facing fear...

1. Ask yourself what it is you are afraid of and then assess whether what you are thinking is a story you have constructed out of the fear, rather than a fact that will definitely happen. In other words, be rational!

2. Chances are that if you are fearful of something it is because you are pushing yourself out of your comfort zone in some way. This is a good thing, so do it.

3. It doesn't matter how hard something feels at the time, or how desperate you feel in the moment, it will get easier. If you are in full fear and overwhelm together, give yourself a moment, don't act in the full emotion of it all. Take some time, if you need it, to reflect.

Don't forget to reach out for help too; we all need a friendly ear or shoulder to cry on. But most importantly remember this: you are amazing, you can do anything, and when you feel at your worst, it is just a moment in the bigger picture of your life, so let it pass, let it teach you what it is meant to and then let it go. Become a better person for it, then you win and it loses!
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31 March 2019

WEEKLY GRATITUDE


^^ Friday's sunset over St Michaels Mount ^^

Before we get into any of this post at all, let me just say Happy Mother's Day to the lunatic that is my mum! Love you, you nut job.

Well, here we are again! These posts come around so fast (I know I say that every single week!). When this post goes live I will be working my very first shift in my new job; it's a part time position at a very beautiful hotel in Carbis Bay, and I truly can't wait to get started. I am a little nervous to get going but it is all about learning the ropes isn't it; it's always the same in any new job for the first couple of weeks as you find your feet, but I am excited to get into more of a routine and settle into the role, so wish me luck!

Of course, the fact that I am now going to be working 20 hours a week, means that I will have to up my organisation game a little! I am already pretty organised with Leaf Lane Studio and the blog, but I will lose my procrastination time, which is no bad thing! I will probably end up being even more productive now!

Right, onto this weeks gratitude/general chit-chat!

:: I'm going to start with a typical British thing to talk about: weather! The weather this week has been absolutely stunning and, although there has been a bit of a chill in the air, the sun has been out, the sky has been blue and it has made me so happy and content.

:: I have had two sunset walks this week and they were both so magical. One evening, Thursday I think, was super clear and Friday was a little misty, which meant you could see the outline of the sun and look at it safely as it set; it was in the sky above St Michaels Mount when I arrived on the coast path and was a deep, dusky orange-red. I love watching the sun go down and taking in the silence that comes with it, it is one of my favourite times of day.

:: There are so many pretty flowers to look at in the hedgerows at this time of year and the bluebells are making an appearance too. I have to stop and look at everything because it all makes me so grateful to be here and have all of this wonderful nature quite literally on the doorstep.


^^ Perranuthnue Church seagulls! ^^

:: I had a very overdue conversation with one of my favourite sea creatures this week, my 'Lobster', Helena! We always manage to leave it way too long between catch ups and then have one ma-hoosive call that really needs an interval for ice creams like in the olden cinema days! It is always so lovely to chat though and bring each other up to speed as life speeds on by!

:: I got out in the garden this week which, if you watch my Instagram Stories, you would have noticed! I had the ladders balanced in many crazy places and could hear my dad saying 'well, that's a stupid idea putting them there', but seeing as he is six hours away and unable to tell me off I just got on with it! What a rebel! There were a couple of ropey moments though but I lived to tell the tale.

:: I got reminded of a song that I absolutely love this week; I can't remember how I first heard it, I have a feeling it was via a random Spotify playlist a while ago, but anyway, it was lovely to rediscover it. The song is 'Tennessee Whiskey' by Chris Stapleton; the guys voice is incredible!

:: This week, whilst working on a bespoke, hand painted wedding card, I binge watched the remainder of the new series of Queer Eye; oh my goodness, it's just so heart warming. My favourite episode is still the one called 'Hose before Bros' (series one) or something like that, all about a fire station and their need to raise some money. I laughed so hard all the way through, it is such a great one, go watch it!



:: I have been struggling to use my Bullet Journal this month, I think I have used it twice; mostly because my mental health has been so bad that I haven't really had the enthusiasm to do it, so I have made April's spread the most simple yet; just functional with no focus on pretty illustrations, to get me back into the habit of using it again, because I have ended up with lists all over the place! The one thing I did stick to was my mini manifestation page and my monthly Oracle Card page, so I will complete those as normal, but not put any pressure on anything more for the next few weeks. I will try to make May more interesting and then pop up a YouTube video showing you how it looks! Does anyone else occasionally go off grid with diaries/journals? Sometimes it seems like too much effort, but actually I lose track of life way too fast without it!

:: After being basically bullied into it by Peta and Fraser, I watched Magic Mike this week. To be honest it was after a really bad day and I just thought, sod it, so threw it on Netflix. I really don't know what I make of that film... I mean, I'm a space geek film through and through, but at least I have watched it now, so the endless Magic Mike references being thrown at me from those two super fans will make more sense to me! Thoughts on Magic Mike people?

:: Little Gizmo has been super cute this week. I have been alone for a few days and she has followed me about even more than usual. She really is like a little dog sometimes! I have napped with her, sat out in the sun with her, gardened with her, worked with her on my lap, fed her my dinner when I was feeling too unwell to eat it (it's been a great week for her!).

My slightly nervous, somewhat scattered mind is going to call it a day there with this weeks post! I will be back, hopefully firing on most of my cylinders, on Wednesday! Have a great new week everyone!

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27 March 2019

TAKING STOCK | MARCH 2019



As we are nearly edging into April (how?!) I thought I would round up March for you with a light-hearted look at what has been happening over the last few weeks; I do love writing these posts so much after all. Let me know in the comments what your best March bits have been.

Let's go!

m a k i n g :: so many paintings and, along with them, realising that I really (really) need to increase my prices! I have been offering commissions for a while now and, as it was quite a new thing to me I didn't feel too comfortable with pricing them. As I have had time to find my style and also gain more experience with the paintings (meaning they have far more details on them too, which equals more hours spent working), I have had a huge realisation that I am not charging enough, not anywhere near enough, and need to have a serious look at that asap.

c o o k i n g :: batches of things! You name it, I have been cooking it (actually, that is BS, because there hasn't been a great deal of variations at all!). I have cooked two different types of curry, a black bean chilli, mince (ready for use in a shepherds pie or something similar) and some lentil burgers! The freezer is satisfyingly stocked up!

d r i n k i n g :: the usual; tea and water, with the occasional glass of Alpro chocolate milk thrown in for added rock n roll-ness! Woo-hoo!

r e a d i n g :: The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho, which I am almost finished. I have a stack of books ready to read, although I am not sure what will be next in line, maybe one of the two Brene Brown books I have on my table!

w a n t i n g :: the sunshine to stick around! As I type this post it is a beautiful day out; the sun is shining, the sky has just a couple of fluffy clouds and the birds are having a whale of a time gathering twigs and things for their nests in the garden. It is my all time favourite time of the year.

p l a y i n g :: Lots of Oasis and random Spotify playlists. I am really enjoying the Oasis live album 'Familiar to Millions' at the moment, I think I'm having a bit of a period of general 90's throwbacks, the music sounds so much better than what's on offer today!

d e c i d i n g :: on what my priorities are for Leaf Lane Studio; I am going through a period of getting my life in order and starting to see things clearer. I think that now I'm a year and a bit into being a business owner, I am able to look at things in a new light and be honest with myself about what is worth my time and what isn't.



w i s h i n g :: for two things, either that I didn't need a nap at 2pm everyday or, if I must be a dozy Doris, that I could hit a pause button on the clock so that I didn't loose the time for working! I literally hit a wall in the afternoons and just need to stop! The problem is that I seem to turn my alarm off without realising too, so what starts off as a half an hour nap, ends up being a two hour sleep and results in me waking up in a panic, dazed and confused. Send help.

e n j o y i n g :: seeing my strength creep up in the gym. It really has seen some big increases over the past couple of months and I am really enjoying being strong! That said, after taking a few days off this week, I am going to hit more high reps and cardio so will probably lose some of what I have gained, but still, I know I am capable of so much more now, and I am super happy with myself!

w a t c h i n g :: quite a few things on Netflix whilst painting. I only really venture into new things whilst I have big chunks of time like that or I will never get to watch the whole thing. I have watched Dirty John (my God that guy was freaky) and After Life, the new Ricky Gervais series, which is absolutely incredible.  

l i k i n g :: delving into Jen Carrington's new business journal prompts book 'Homecoming', which I bought last week. I am taking my time to go through the questions and really bring myself back into alignment with how I want things to be. You should check it out if you are a blogger or creative business owner, because I honestly think you will love it.

w o n d e r i n g :: when I may see some live music again... it has been about eight years since I have seen anything and I miss it, a lot! I need to keep my eyes peeled for next years Eden Sessions, because I always forget and then miss the chance!

l o v i n g :: watching the weekly studio vlogs from Katnipp Illustration on YouTube; I mention her a lot but that is because she is so positive all the time and such a joy to watch!

h o p i n g :: to get an enamel pin designed and made within the next couple of months to sell on behalf of a mental health charity. I have two designs on the go right now and will be working on them over the next few weeks and will get them up on Instagram for you guys to let me know the one you like best! Make sure you are following my From Lucy with Love and Leaf Lane Studio accounts so you don't miss the poll; I'd love your feedback!

m a r v e l l i n g :: over the full moon we had this month, it was so gorgeous and super big in the sky; I love the energy around that time too (except for how it makes Gizmo go totally bonkers; does anyone else notice their pets behaviour change around a full moon?).

n e e d i n g :: all the usual things: more sleep, a hair cut and colour and clothes without holes!

s m e l l i n g :: freshly cut grass! The true sign of the better weather returning is when you get a little hint of freshly mowed grass in the air, I love it so much! 

w e a r i n g :: gym kit... jammies... strange combinations of clothes as usual. Fashionable I am not!

f o l l o w i n g :: my intuition a lot more in every day life (or trying to!). If something feels good, then it is the right thing for me, if not then it needs to change or go altogether. Simples!

k n o w i n g :: that Cornwall is my home and nothing will take me away from it now. We have been here for just over two years and I can honestly say that my life is here now; all of me is within this beautiful place that makes me so full of joy to live here every single day of the week. I have always felt like, on a more spiritual level, I belong in Cornwall, right from the very first visit years and years ago, but now it is home and I feel settled living here, with amazing friends and stunning views around every corner. It would take one hell of a thing to make me up-sticks now.

t h i n k i n g :: about moving this blog to a new platform. I have been pondering this for a while as, currently I am still on 'Blogger', and having now experienced 'Squarespace', which is what I use for my business, I know how much more I can do on a different platform. My only reason for delaying is that if I am going to do it, I need to do it properly, thinking about branding and the future of the blog properly before I do! I am finding my voice a lot more with blogging but also I would like to become better at bringing more Cornwall based things here too; show more adventures and places to visit. I am in the middle of a big old life shuffle, with ideas and creativity coming out all over the shop, so I am mindful of just thinking before doing my usual 'bull in a china shop' approach!

There we have it... March round up, done! Onward to a new month we go!

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24 March 2019

WEEKLY GRATITUDE


^^ The gorgeous Trengwainton Garden (National Trust) in Penzance are the source of all of today's pictures! ^^

Sunday, how are you back so soon? Seriously, are these weeks zooming by or what; it's April any second now! I am so happy that the mornings are lighter now; by the time I leave the house for the gym at about 6.25am it is super light now although, that said, the clocks are soon to change aren't they, but spring time is definitely here!

I have been fairly busy this week with Leaf Lane Studio projects, including some commission pieces and wedding stationery orders, plus a couple of other exciting things have come through to me also, so that is great; next week I will be busy cracking on with those things and then on Sunday I start my new job too - busy times ahead.

Let's get on with this weeks list shall we?!

:: There are so many sparrows building their little nests around the garden right now and they can be seen with beaks stuffed full of twigs and whatever random bits they've discovered on their travels; they are so cute to watch, I love having the little bird families in the garden each spring, it fills me with joy.

:: After a bit of a difficult day on Tuesday (see this post for more about what has been going on recently) I treated myself to a magazine and some chocolate, because sometimes it is needed, and Tuesday was one of those times! I used to buy so many magazines, but haven't at all over the last couple of years, other than wedding ones for business reasons. It was lovely to sit and mindlessly flick through something that wasn't too much for my brain to handle. I set aside Tuesday as a 'nothingness' day, because I knew I was going to feel worn out and a little bit like taking a long nap (which I also did). These days I never have times where I do nothing whatsoever and I enjoyed the few hours I had so much.



:: This weeks program of choice whilst painting has been another Netflix series, Dirty John, and my word, that guy is creepy as hell isn't he?! Have you seen it yet? 

:: I mentioned over on Instagram, earlier this week, something I had heard on episode 343 of Lori Harder's 'Earn Your Happy' podcast that was such a light-bulb moment for me in several ways. Her guest, Adam Roa, was talking about seeing how things '...happen for you and not to you...' and went on to say how that when we are in one of those times where we feel like our lives our falling apart, it is merely a 'hollowing out' in order to create space for something new to come in. Another interesting thing Adam said was how we can't move forward to our 'next chapter' when we are 'still reading the previous one' and that the more we hold onto our previous one, the more violently it will be ripped out of our hands. Talk about an 'ah-ha' moment!

:: Yesterday I did a load of batch cooking including two curries, a tomato based chicken curry and a chickpea curry too as well as a big batch of lentil burgers. The freezer is now stocked up with easy to defrost and heat up meals again. I hate thinking about batch cooking but it is never as bad as I think when I get going! I also need to do a chilli too, but I am missing one ingredient so I will get that done on Tuesday evening once I have been shopping (jealous of the rock n roll life aren't cha!). Life is so busy that batch cooking at the weekend is so much easier and stops the whole 'let's just grab something easy' thing (usually a pizza or something if and when it happens).



:: Did you guys see the full moon this week? It was so beautiful, especially first thing on Thursday morning; when I left for training it was sitting low in the sky, looking absolutely stunning, can't beat a bit of sky-watching in my opinion.

:: This week I have been listening to a lot of Abraham Hicks talks on YouTube; I don't know whether you have ever listened to any, but I love them so much. Take them for what they are and just absorb the words and there is so much goodness in there.

:: This week I decided to treat myself to something to help clear out my brain of all the business-related 'gumpf' that is going on in there, so I treated myself to the wonderful Jen Carrington's new e-book, Homecoming, which is a 100 page journal prompt / guide to help bring yourself back to yourself in terms of your 'why' and your intentions for your business. It was only £18 and is something that, so far, I am finding really useful. I have some unexpected free-time next week where I will be sitting down, meditating and journaling on quite a few things, and this guide will be a massive part of what I am delving in to.

:: Some blog posts and other things I have enjoyed this week are: Peta's 'Wonderful Wednesday' - always a beautiful read each week. You really should follow her on Instagram @nourishingsoulfully as her Insta-stories are really brill! / 'The Fringe of It' podcast, episode 40, with Lucy Sheridan, who is a comparison coach and totally wonderful human / 'Letters from a Hopeful Creative' podcast, episode 32, 'Mailing List Q & A' - really insightful and actionable info from the lovely girlies this week!

:: Lastly, but definitely not in order of importance, is how grateful I am to the bloody amazing people I have in my life... love you guys so much. With everything that has been going on and with my brain taking itself off on a holiday here and there, I appreciate all the love, the advice, the Netflix recommendations, the cat memes (!), flowers... everything. It isn't easy to let people really see you, the real version of you, in time of vulnerability (especially when you are an Olympic champ at putting on a brave, smiley face!), but I just want you to know how much it means to me, which is a lot.

I will be back on Wednesday and hope to have a new vlog up soon too, just have to edit the thing! Next week has a very long 'to-do' list attached to it, but I am excited to work through it all. Have a good week guys, see you Wednesday!

PS: You still have a few more days to grab 30% off my printable calendars over on Leaf Lane Studio, just use the code 'HAPPYMARCH' at the checkout and the calendar will drop to just £3.00 - print it as many times as you like! Enjoy!

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